Anchor
by tequilamoon
Summary: Five years after an accident left her without any memory of who she is or how she got there, Cordelia Lowman is ready to leave her rehabilitative care facility. Happy might think he's ready for his wife to come home, but how long until their life unravels and secrets reveal themselves?
1. Chapter 1

"I'll put it quite simple, Mr. Lowman," Dr. Newman began as he readjusted his glasses and reorganized his notes. He was trying to find a way to tell the news to the man sitting beside him, but he didn't know how the man would take it. "Cordelia's mind is getting stronger every day. There has been a tremendous amount of improvement in the last month and," he paused to take a deep breath, "I believe she will be ready to leave this facility in less than a month."

The man beside the good doctor leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. He looked at the doctor and studied his face. Over the countless times he had visited in the last five years, he never though he'd hear those words. He watched as the man in front of his pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose as he questioned him. "What do you mean her mind's stronger? She still doesn't know who I am. Whenever I see her, she's just sitting there, drawing pictures or something. It's like she's all holed up in that mind of hers" Happy Lowman stated. He didn't believe what the doctor was telling him. He had just come to see Cordelia at the hospital an hour ago and all he saw was Cordelia drawing some damn picture in that same damn red chair she always sat in when Dr. Newman pulled him aside.

"What I mean, Mr. Lowman, is that your wife is starting to remember. She can recall the nurses' names and she's finally able to write again. Her speech is improving every day. Quite frankly, Mr. Lowman, I've never seen so much improvement in such a little time. It's nothing short of a miracle," Dr. Newman beamed at the dark-eyed man sitting beside him. "I believe it's time for her to go home. We've done most of what we can do for her in the past five years, but I know she will continue improving when she comes home with you – I just know it! Of course, I'll need her to continue an out-patient therapy program – to monitor her progress – but I can release her into your care by the end of the month."

Happy Lowman took a deep breath in and raked his hand over his freshly shaven head. He stared at Dr. Newman for a while, thinking about what to do. Cordelia Lowman had been a patient at a rehabilitative care centre linked with the Bakersfield Memorial Hospital for just over five years and never did he think it would take this long to hear those words – his wife was ready to come home. He just didn't know if he was ready. It wasn't an easy time for her to come home with him. He had transferred from the Tacoma charter of the Sons of Anarchy into the Nomad charter not too long ago and there was no way he could bring his wife with him on the road. He thought about his mother, who too was sick, and he knew there was no way he could ask her or his aunt, Juanita, to take care of Cordelia. He didn't know how much work it'd be, but he just couldn't do that to those two old women.

Happy sighed. He was torn. This was what he had wanted for the last five years of his life – for his wife to be well enough to come home. But Cordelia wasn't exactly ready to come home. Like the doctor said, she was going to improve at home and that meant Hap had to be at home. "What are the other options, doc?" Happy asked, not looking the doctor in the eyes.

"Other options?" Dr. Newman asked, confused. "What do you mean, Mr. Lowman?"

"What I mean is…what else can I do with her? I don't know how to care for her, man. I can't care for her. It's just…it'll be too hard."

"Hard for her…or for you? I don't believe for a second it will be easy, Mr. Lowman, but it's what's best for her. This will complete her recovery. You do understand that, right? She is almost there."

"No, I get that," Happy bit out. "I just…I just don't know. It's been five years. What if…what if she's not the same?" _What if I'm not the same?_ "I don't live in Tacoma anymore. There will be no home for her to come to. She won't recognize anything or anyone – how can that possibly help her?"

"Well, her surroundings will definitely be different, but she'll have you. Share your memories, tell her stories, just talk to her – she will get better."

Happy listened to the doctor's words as he looked over to Cordelia, still sitting in that red chair, still working on that drawing. He watched as she picked up her pencil and began shading a part of the piece. He could see her as she decided on what to accomplish next. Happy watched her bite her lip as she moved to a different part of the page as he thought about what to do. He opened his mouth to tell the doctor that no, he possibly couldn't take her home with him yet when she placed the pencil down and glanced over at him, smiling.

_Oh, fuck_. It was that damn smile. The one where her eyes lit up and made her look aglow. The one where her happiness displayed prominently on her face. The one where she looked fucking gorgeous. Happy stared at Cordelia as she pushed her hair behind her ears and out of her eyes. Nowadays her strawberry blond hair was well past the shoulder length she kept it at during their life together, but it still had that similar wave to it. The word 'no' was on the tip of Happy's tongue when Cordelia got up from the red chair and walked across the room to him and Dr. Newman.

"Hello, Happy," Cordelia bit her lip as she glanced over at Happy before looking at the ground. "Uhm…I …uh, completed the picture, Dr. Newman," Cordelia breathed out. "I'd like to show you…both if you'd like," she smiled, shyly this time at Happy.

"I think we'd very much like that – wouldn't you agree Mr. Lowman?"

Happy looked over to Dr. Newman, hating that his wife acted so shyly around him ever since the accident that damaged her. Her long-term memory had been effected and it had taken them a while to finally convince her that Happy was, indeed, her husband. She still acted cautiously around him, carefully choosing her words and behaving modestly around him. His dark eyes and tattooed body still made her wary of him, but she had definitely warmed up to him over the last five years. Sure, Cordelia didn't know what their relationship was like before her accident, but she couldn't imagine not seeing Happy every weekend – it was a routine that she looked forward to on Sundays. After Marina and Juanita's visits on Saturdays, she looked forward to Happy's visits the most. Some weeks they talked and others they didn't. He occasionally helped her with puzzles, but most of the time he sat and watched her while she drew.

Happy looked away from Dr. Newman and over to Cordelia. She, once again, dropped her eyes from his, looking down to the ground. "Yeah, sure. Let's go look at this picture."

Happy stood from his seat and walked over to the red chair with his wife and Dr. Newman trailing behind him, but he wasn't prepared for what he saw. As he glanced down at the table, Happy's heart pounded in his chest. He stared down at the paper as Cordelia began to speak.

"It's something I thought of," she spoke quietly to the two men. "I don't remember where I've seen it, but, I uh –"

"It's one of my tattoos," Happy spoke, "on my back," he said as he looked over her head to Dr. Newman.

"Cordelia, that's a fantastic drawing, dear! Did you remember the tattoo?"

Cordelia looked between the two men, eyes wide. "Oh, I had no idea. It just came to me…when I saw Happy come in today."

Happy looked down at the paper again, staring at the drawing of the tattoo. This was the puzzle piece on his back. Inside his puzzle piece was an anchor – because that's what she was to him – his anchor. She grounded him when he came home from runs and she was the one he always returned to, anchoring him anywhere she was. She had a matching one, too, on her back and inside her puzzle piece was a boat. Together, the puzzle pieces represented two things that needed each other. The boat, without the anchor would be lost at sea, while the anchor, without the boat, would be pointless. Happy and Cordelia had inked these tattoos on one another the day before they got married as their gifts to one another. Right then, Happy looked over at Dr. Newman and he knew what he was going to do.

"Hey, Del…Delia, babe, look at me."

Cordelia raised her eyes to look at Happy.

"Delia, how'd you like to leave?"

"Leave?" Cordelia gasped. She couldn't imagine not being here, in her safe little space. "I, I, I just can't leave," she stumbled over her words, "I have group art time to attend, and I, uhm, I haven't finished nearly enough puzzles, yet, and –" she continued on without pausing to take a breath. Happy watched his flustered wife count off reasons on her hand as Dr. Newman raised his eyebrows at Happy.

"Cordelia, dear," Dr. Newman placed a comforting hand on her shoulder, "you don't have to if you don't want to, but you'd be going home with your husband. You'd be living together, dear. You can continue in the out-patient program, but I believe your memories are almost there, sweetheart." Dr. Newman smiled at his patient. "You've made a tremendous amount of progress in the last five years. We've helped you regain all your motor skills, your speech, your mannerisms, but I believe, dear, that going home would only help you further. Happy knows you, Cordelia. He can help you gain your memories. He can help you on the outside dear. There would be no benefit to staying here for you. Do you understand?"

Cordelia looked at Dr. Newman, wide-eyed and terrified. "I do, but what if…I mean, what if I'm too different," she whispered out the last part, glancing over at Happy.

"Then we'll relearn each other," Happy explained. "I'll help you remember. I'll take care your of you. I'll be your…friend." Happy grimaced at that word. He definitely wanted to be more than friends with his own damn wife.

"What about Marina and Juanita? Can I still see them?"

Happy let out a small laugh. "Yeah, doll, you can see my mother and my aunt. They don't live too far from here."

"Okay, good…You're sure you can help me remember? You won't give up, will you?"

"No, Del. I'll help you remember," Happy promised.

Dr. Newman smiled at the pair. "Excellent! I'll finalize the paperwork, and you can leave on Wednesday, dear. Congratulations." Dr. Newman beamed at Cordelia and shook Happy's hand. "Mr. Lowman, I'll get hold of you once the paperwork is final, and you should be free to take your wife home with you by the weekend," he beamed at the couple before leaving them to speak with a nurse not too far away.

"I guess it's up to us now, huh?" Cordelia wrung her hands as she stood alone with her husband.

"Yeah, Del. It's up to us to help you remember our life," Happy spoke. _Even if all I wanna do is forget it._


	2. Chapter 2

Happy shifted his aunt's beat-up old Volkswagen rabbit into third gear as he sped down the freeway. He had just picked up Cordelia from the hospital and he couldn't imagine any other situation being more awkward than the one he was in right now. Since he had picked her up not even an hour ago they had exchanged 'hellos' and a smile on behalf of Cordelia. He normally hated chatty people, but right now he despised the silence around him.

One person who Happy wished was more quiet was Dr. Newman who, on the other hand, had been chatty as sin. That man just would not stop yammering – telling Happy to call him if things took a turn for the worse or even if things became better. Making sure Happy knew to keep to a routine, to take her places, to help her get her memories back. What did that man not understand? What if Happy didn't want Cordelia to remember every single little thing about their messed-up marriage? Some things were better left in the dark and Happy Lowman knew all about that.

Cordelia, just like Dr. Newman, was eager to remember. She told Dr. Newman how 'she'll be over the moon happy' when she remembers her life and when she gets herself back. To Happy, his happy life with Cordelia kind of depended on her not remembering every little thing about him. _Fuck, this is gonna be hard_.

Happy glanced over to Cordelia as she stared out the window watching everything pass by. She had a small smile on her lips and Happy honestly could not remember the last time his wife looked so carefree – so peaceful. He knew it had been a long time. Longer than the five years she was inside the hospital that was for sure. Probably long before the last few months of their marriage, too. Long before everything started going to shit. Happy knew he'd screwed up royally for her. He knew there was a reason Gemma always said he'd either have to leave her out or bring her in completely to his life. He just never realized how much he was screwing them both by keeping her out of it all.

For the fifth time that hour Happy found himself wondering if he was doing the right thing. Taking her from that rehabilitation centre last week seemed like the best idea and today it seemed like the worst. _I should've just kept paying them to take care of her_.

Happy looked over to Cordelia and cleared his throat, but she continued to stare out the moving car's window.

"Uh...Del, baby," Happy started, waiting for his wife to look at him. "I asked my aunt to go into town with you tomorrow. Get you some new clothes and stuff."

"Yeah," Cordelia nodded her head. "That'd be great. It's wonderful to get out of those hospital clothes. I can't wait to wear shorts again."

"Yeah, but baby, don't forget it's only November. It ain't that warm, right now. You're better off just in pants or something, at least until the warmer weather in April or May."

"I guess so...it's just been so long, you know? I just keep forgetting about things like wearing shorts. I haven't worn them in so long." Cordelia smiled at Happy as he signaled to exit the freeway. "So, we're going to your Ma's house now, but when are we going home, Hap?"

Happy sighed. He knew she was going to ask that. "Yeah, about that...what home are you taking about, Del?"

Cordelia furrowed her eyebrows. "Uhm...I don't know, really. I'm assuming a home…with you?" she questioned, pushing her hair behind her ears.

"Yeah, but I don't live anywhere you'd know anymore."

"I get that things have changed these past five years, but I'm just confused. Dr. Newman said we used to live in California and that we moved to Tacoma not too long before my accident..." Cordelia trailed off, looking to her husband to see if she was right. She really hated not being able to remember everything. It was like her life played as a movie in her head constantly, but she could only see or hear bits and pieces. Nothing was continuous and nothing made any sense to her.

She couldn't ever mention these thoughts to either Dr. Newman of Happy. They'd think she was crazy if she told them she dreamed of finding dead bodies or watching Happy kill someone. She had no idea where these thoughts came from and they were part of the reason Cordelia was so unsure all the time around Happy. The constant guilt she felt whenever she looked at her husband and saw a gun in his hand, shooting at someone, made her feel like a horrible wife. These vivid ideas are why Cordelia always questioned everything she said. She had no idea what she really remembered and what her mind was just creating.

"Yeah," Happy confirmed, "we lived California for a bit, but then I moved up to Tacoma –"

"Didn't I come with you?"

"Yeah, you did. So, we moved up to Tacoma," Happy repeated, stressing the 'we'. "Lived there for a couple of years, too...but then you had your accident."

The car remained silent for a couple of minutes, as Happy drove through downtown Bakersfield. The silence was only broken by Cordelia.

"What happened then? After my accident why didn't you leave me in Tacoma with you? Why'd you send me to Bakersfield, Happy? You only just left Tacoma a few months ago, but I just don't get it."

Happy thought for a minute. He wasn't entirely sure how to answer that question, but he decided to give her some variant of the truth. "I wanted you close to my ma and my aunt. With Ma being sick and all, I thought it'd help both of you to have, like, a friendly face or somethin'."

"Oh…" Cordelia bit her lip as Happy pulled into a driveway. The small one-story bungalow looked like it had definitely seen better days. The white paint on the siding seemed to be peeling off and the grass was a tad overgrown. The chain-link fence surrounding the property was starting to come apart and the screen on the front door had rips and tears all over.

"Place looks like a fuckin' disaster," Happy muttered under his breath. "Okay, Del, here's the deal. You'll be staying with Ma and 'Nita for a little bit, at least until I can sort things out down in Charming. I've put in a transfer from the Nomads into SAMCRO and, once it's all settled, I'll bring you back with me. Give it a week or two, 'kay?"

Cordelia just looked at Happy, confusion written all over her face. "Nomad and SAMCRO...that's got something to do with your motorcycle club, right? Charming's that small little town, too? Still in San Joa?"

"Yeah, Nomad's the charter I transferred into from Tacoma's. SAMCRO's the mother charter I prospected at in Charming – that small little town in Son Joa county."

"Okay," Cordelia reached for the door handle, but stopped. "Can I ask one more thing?"

Happy sighed, "I don't see why not." Even if he said no, she'd probably ask anyways.

"What happened? Why'd the accident happen?"

Happy looked over at his wife, confused. "What d'ya mean? You lost your memory. Some asshole teenager drag racin' his friends T-boned your car at an intersection one night and you lost everything. You were in a fucking coma for three months after that, too. When you woke up…you had no idea who you were, where you were, or any idea about anything."

"No, but...I get all that, I mean...what was I doing out of the house at three in the morning? Did I usually go out that early? Or late?"

Happy ran his hand over his head. "No, Del. You didn't usually go out at three in the mornin'. That night…we fought. You got upset and left."

"How bad was this fight that I left at three a.m.? What could've possibly happened?"

Happy thought long and hard about how to answer that question. _Damnit, it wasn't supposed to be this hard this soon_. He couldn't tell her that in the months leading up to that night, their marriage had been crumbling. Or that he'd freaked one night when he thought she was two-timin' him. Or even that she'd had divorce papers drawn up that he'd found the morning after; she just never go the chance to give them to him. No, Happy knew he couldn't tell Cordelia any of that, but he also knew that he could never tell Cordelia the reason she had her accident was because she was scared of him – running from him and what he does for the Sons. Happy knew that the truth would hurt more than his lie.

"Cleanliness."

"Cleanliness?"

"Yeah. You didn't like the mess I made one night. We fought. You left." _Close enough_.

"Oh…it must've been a horrible…mess…" Cordelia opened her door, completely confused. What a stupid reason to fight. She couldn't picture ever fighting over something so…trivial, but she guessed Happy remembered better than she did. He was the one with a functioning memory after all.

"Hey," Happy called to Cordelia as he got out of his aunt's car. "Give these to my aunt," Happy asked as he tossed the keys to Juanita's rabbit at Cordelia.

"You're not coming in?"

"No. I gotta get down to Charming. Somethin' came up while I was waitin' for you at the hospital. I'll be back tomorrow, kay? Help you get settled and all."

"Okay. I'll see you then, I guess." Cordelia offered a shy smile, not quite sure what to do in this situation. Did she kiss him? Offer him a hug? It didn't seem like Happy had the same dilemma, though. As he walked over to his bike parked on the street.

"See you later, Del."

Cordelia settled on a wave and then she turned around and knocked on the door. His aunt came to the door and he vaguely heard her chastising Cordelia about never knocking on that door again. Happy's aunt smiled and waved when she saw him. She already knew he wasn't staying for dinner tonight. Something for which Happy was thankful for because that meant she wasn't talking his ear off about eating a healthy meal. He did, however, know he'd get an earful tomorrow for not walking Del to the door. He couldn't wait for that.

Happy started up his bike as he looked up at the door that Cordelia had closed not even a minute ago. As he sat there, he knew without a doubt that if he wanted to make this work he was going to have to bring Cordelia in all the way this time. No lying, no secrets, no keeping her in dark. He just hoped like hell she didn't flip her shit again.

* * *

Hello all! I cannot believe the favourites, follows, or reviews. You are all so wonderful and encouraging! I've now mapped out this story completely. I know the direction I am taking it in and it's just a matter of writing it, editing it, and posting it. I'll hopefully set up some sort of schedule to the postings, too. Lastly, I hope you'll all bear with me during midterms season and I wish the best of luck to anyone dealing with these now, too.

I didn't say this last Monday, when I posted chapter one, but happy belated Thanksgiving to all my fellow Canadians! Hope you all had a great long weekend and a fantastic short week at school/work.

:)


	3. Chapter 3

_It was a cold and dark night when Cordelia parked her car and walked towards the building. She reached in her purse, using the moonlight to help her rifle around a bit before pulling out a small gold key. Cordelia easily let herself in the tiny office and quietly walked over the desk. She was rummaging through the papers on top of the desk, trying to find something, when she heard a muffled scream come from the garage. She ignored it the first time, but when it came a second she decided to investigate. _

_Happy had always told her that her curiosity would be the death of her one day, but she couldn't help herself as she peaked through the doorway. Cordelia honestly couldn't explain what she was prepared to see, but it definitely was not what she was looking at because what she was looking at left her speechless._

_It was her husband, but that wasn't what shocked her. What left Cordelia wide-eyed and speechless was when she suddenly realized that Happy wasn't alone – there was a man standing in front of him with a gun pressed against his chest. She saw some words being exchanged between the two of them and then Happy raised a gun to the man's head._

_Cordelia's hands flew to her mouth. Sure, she wasn't a complete idiot. She knew her husband wasn't a saint. One look at him – with his body covered in tattoos and his menacing glare – and anyone would know. She knew he carried a gun since he always tried to get her to carry, but she steadfastly ignored his warnings. What did she need to protect herself from in Charming? _

_Evidently, her husband, she thought._

_Cordelia was still trying to process what she was seeing – her husband's gun pressed up against someone's head. She had never seen Happy pull a gun on anyone, ever. If she hadn't been looking with her own eyes, she wasn't sure she would believe it, either. This was surreal. What was Happy doing! Cordelia just wanted to be home know, away from here, away from seeing this, and away from her husband. She was still gawking at the situation when Happy pulled the trigger – shooting the man in the head. The man's blood sprayed everywhere as it coated the plastic covered wall behind him. His limp body dropped to the floor. Cordelia's hands flew to her mouth as she tried to mask her terror. She had never seen a dead body before. She was faintly aware of someone screaming before she realized it was her. _

_Cordelia watched as Happy's head snapped towards her. It was then that she finally noticed the other people in the room with her husband. Cordelia was acutely aware of at least two other people standing close to him. For the first time, Cordelia was terrified of her husband. She was terrified of the men he stood with. She backed away slowly from the doorway, hands still over her mouth, as Happy walked closer with his gun still in his hand._

"_Fuckin' great," Happy muttered as Cordelia stared at him with tears streaming down her face._

"_What the hell, Happy! What did you do? You killed him, Happy! You fucking killed him!" Cordelia screamed as she pounded her hands into her husband's chest. She let out a strangled yell as Happy gripped her wrists tightly to stop her incessant pounding against her chest. "No! Get away from me," Cordelia struggled against her husband, "get away!"_

"_Fuckin' quiet her down, Hap. She'll wake up the whole damn neighbourhood," a second voice chastised. Cordelia looked to him, his president's patch lit by the moonlight. Cordelia took a deep breath in, staring wide-eyed at her husband and the two men who stepped up beside him. _

_The second man smiled crookedly at Cordelia. His hair was wild as her stared her down. "Guess you have some explainin' to do, eh Hap?" he chuckled. "Shoulda brought her in, man. Shoulda brought her in all the way."_

* * *

Cordelia woke up with a gasp. She could feel the sweat beading down her back from the heat of the comforter as she pushed the warm, down-filled comforter off her body and sat up, pulling her knees into her chest. It took a moment for her to catch her breath. It was that damn dream again and she was positive that she had only been minutes from screaming bloody murder. That was the last thing she wanted right now – a worried mother-in-law and aunt running into the room. How would she explain the screaming? That she dreamt of her husband shooting someone's brains out. Oh, and that it wasn't a one-time nightmare, too – it was recurring. Yeah, right. Marina and Juanita would probably send her to some hospital to get checked. Happy didn't kill people, Cordelia was just crazy. She was used to this nightmare by now as she'd been having it for a while. It started back when she was at the rehabilitative centre and she'd hoped it'd end once she left, but Cordelia was not that lucky.

This time, however, the dream was different than usual. This time, the dream didn't end with the man's body falling to the ground. This time there were other men there – ones Cordelia didn't recognize. It only made sense, right? That she didn't recognize them. This was, after all, her nightmare. She remembered Dr. Newman telling her that the difference between her dreams and her reality was that she would recognize familiar places and people. That was how Cordelia knew this nightmare was nothing to be scared of – she recognized nothing. Cordelia firmly believed that, even though her memory of her life before the accident was pretty much gone, she would feel some sort of familiarity or pull towards memories. That was the one comforting thought about that nightmare; it wasn't real.

Cordelia yawned as she stretched out her body. Today was the day Happy was finally taking her home to Charming. Not to say that Cordelia didn't enjoy spending time with her mother-in-law and Happy's aunt, but there was only so much she could take of the two sister's bickering before going insane. Cordelia couldn't count how many times Happy's mother and aunt chastised her for being too skinny and not eating enough. She had been stuffed full of food for the last two weeks and she was definitely looking forward to a break in the never ending parade of nourishment in the house. After two weeks of living with them, Cordelia was more than ready to get a break from the craziness.

* * *

Clay looked around the table – his eyes landing on Happy. The members of SAMCRO had just put his transfer to table. Happy was no longer a Nomad, but part of the Redwood charter. On the other hand, Tig's refusal to let go of the past meant Kozik was still out. Clay stared at Happy, who had been unusually quiet today – more so than normal. "You," Clay pointed at the enforcer, "what's got your panties in a twist? If it's the vote we just took, now's the time to speak your peace."

Happy leaned back in his chair. "Nah, Prez. All good."

"Then what's got you so silent, killa?"

Happy shrugged as Juice laughed, "Haven't you met 'im? Tall, dark, and silent over there." Bobby hit the back of Juice's head as Happy leaned forward.

The chapel was silent as the members of SAMCRO watched their newly transferred member.

"All right then. I guess church is –"

"Del's out."

Clay's hand froze in the air as he was about to pound the gavel down. His eyes travelled back over to Happy's. "Cordelia?" Clay questioned. Happy nodded his head. "Good for her," Clay looked around the table, "but what's it gotta do with us?"

The chapel was dead silent. Every member watched Happy intently. They all remembered Cordelia. Everyone knew about the incident. Cordelia had come into the office one night, claiming to be looking for something that she forgot there during the day. Accidentally walking in on Happy, Tig, and Clay killing someone, she screamed so loudly it brought everyone inside the Clubhouse out. It was then that Cordelia began to 'lose her shit', as Tig always put it. Not long after the incident, Happy transferred up to Tacoma; Cordelia followed not too far behind. Last anyone in SAMCRO heard, Cordelia was injured in a drunken driving accident and had completely lost her memory.

"She's remembering stuff."

"Stuff? What stuff, Hap? Dead stuff? I swear to God, if this shit lands on our doorstep again, it ain't gonna be so easy to fix next time, yeah?"

"I don't know what she remembers," Happy breathed in deeply, "but she got outta the rehab place about two weeks ago. Been livin' with my ma and my aunt for a little while up in Bakersfield. She's gonna be comin' to Charming today."

Clay stared long and hard at Happy. Everyone in Chapel watched the exchange between the two men raptly. "Fine," Clay bit out, "but you sort your shit this time, Hap. I don't want any of what happened before happening again. Alright?"

Happy nodded his head as Clay banged the gavel down. "Church is over."

Happy got up and walked outside, Kozik following not too far behind. "Hap, man. You sure this is right, bringing her back here? What if she has a break down again? She doesn't handle this life well, man." Kozik pulled on Happy's shoulder to get his attention.

"No," Happy answered, shrugging Kozik's hand off his shoulder as he turned to face the blonde man. "I don't think it's right at all, but I have to do it. I owe it to her after all the shit that happened."

"Come on, man! You owe her nothing. She flipped when things got rough."

"She saw me kill a man and then she walked in on a dead body at our place, Koz. I made her flip."

"Well, yeah…but, I mean, she just fuckin' lost it. What happened here, what happened in Tacoma – she bailed on you. You think she can handle it? Do you remember when she left? She was hysterical for Christ's sake."

"I know," Happy rasped out, "I was there both times. Now, are you coming with me to my ma's or not?"

Kozik laughed. "And give up a chance to get free food from Mary and Jo?" he smiled, walking over to his bike. "Nah, I'm comin'."

Happy was almost to his bike when he felt a tap on his shoulder. "You didn't think you could leave without telling me that she's comin' back, did you, Hap?" Happy turned around to see Gemma Teller-Morrow standing behind him.

"Course not, Gem. Just gonna take me some time to let you know."

"Yeah, well, I know, now." Gemma stared at Happy. "You didn't think you could keep her away did you, Hap? You know I got nothin' but love for that girl. Bring her by here, when you're back. I wanna say 'hello' to the new and improved Cordelia Lowman." Gemma smiled, smugly. "You know what…bring her by tomorrow night. Family dinner. My house. At seven. Let's reintroduce her to some of this craziness, eh? Since we know how well it went last time to keep her out. Let her in this time, Hap. Make it easier on all of us," Gemma told him as she turned on her heel towards the office. "Oh, and don't be late!" She called over her shoulder as she walked inside.

Happy watched as Gemma walked towards the office where Clay was standing in the doorway, waiting for her. Happy grimaced as he sat down on his Dyna. He didn't know what was worse. Remembering his wife's hatred and fear of him and the Sons, or knowing that in twenty-four hours he was going to be reintroducing her to this lifestyle and all the craziness it came with, too.

He only hoped she didn't hate him for it again.

* * *

**Happy Friday, everybody! Sorry if you got the chapter update three times. I uploaded chapter two by accident twice! Anyways, here's chapter 3. Hope you all have a great weekend!**

**Once again, thanks for the favourites, follows, and reviews! It always makes my day when I get those notifications!**


	4. Chapter 4

Cordelia sat facing the mirror. She ran her hands through her hair a couple more times, just to get used to it. She hadn't had hair this short in years. While she was in the hospital, haircuts were rare. She had gotten used to always putting it up in a ponytail, but now her hair was too short to make one. It sat just above her shoulders – a short bob cut. Cordelia smiled at her reflection, liking the way she looked. It had been so long since she looked at herself properly in a mirror, but here she could see clearly her reflection. She looked young, refreshed, happy. Cordelia hadn't felt this carefree in years. Here, there were no tests or doctors - no one trying to make her better. Cordelia felt at ease. Nobody was constantly reminding her of her failings or the fact that she really had no idea who she was. She found herself hoping that Happy liked it, but that thought only made her frustrated. He had only been to visit twice since he dropped her off with his mother and aunt two weeks ago. Cordelia found herself frowning at her reflection when Happy's mother, Marina, walked into the room.

"Above the shoulder looks good on you, Delia," she smiled at her in the mirror.

"Thanks. I found some pictures in the living room last week and that's what really motivated me to cut it. I never knew what I looked like before the accident. I can't believe my hair was ever this short. All it's been doing for the past few years is growing. I felt it was time for a change…that and I was tired of it taking hours to dry," Cordelia laughed, turning around in chair.

"That's true. It seems you and my son now don't have to worry about long drying times," Marina laughed. "It looks gorgeous on you, darling. Oh! If only I had hair your colour, sweetheart. So beautiful," Marina gushed, walking over to run her hands through her daughter-in-law's hair.

"You know, Mama Marina, they do have dyes. I think it's strawberry blonde they call it. We could go grab some at the store."

"I know, sweetie. I just don't know if that colour would work for me, yeah?" Marina chuckled. "Besides, I'm too old to dye my hair. Grey is… becoming for a woman of my age. Enough about my hair, though. Are you all packed?"

"Not all packed. I wasn't too sure what to bring since Happy's picking me up today on his bike."

"Nonsense, Delia. We've talked about this already. You'll be taking my car to that small little town. No reason for both me and Juanita to have a car. Lord knows I don't go anywhere, now. With my illness and all, it's best for me not to drive."

Cordelia turned around in her chair to face her mother-in-law. She knew full well that Marina's health had been deteriorating for quite some time; it was one of the few things her and Happy talked about when he would visit. "Marina, I can't do that. It's your car and –"

Marina shushed her daughter-in-law by placing her finger against her lips. "Not another word! You will take the car and you will be happy about it, yeah? I'm not letting my son drag you to that town without a way for you to come back here," Marina laughed as she began walking around what had been Delia's room for the last two weeks. "Frankly, I'm surprised he's not just leaving you here or letting you go back to Washington."

Cordelia had been about to start packing some of her clothes in the suitcase Marina had lent her, but she stood still at her mother-in-law's last comment. "What do you mean by that?"

"Mean by what, dear?"

"That you're surprised he's not leaving me here or dropping me off in Washington. You know as well as I do that you guys are my only family since my parents died. I wouldn't want to be anywhere else." Cordelia questioned, her eyebrows furrowing on her forehead.

"No, of course I know we're your only family. I was at your parents' funeral, after all. All I meant was that… you and Happy don't necessarily have the best… relationship," Marina's voice got higher pitched at the end of her explanation, almost as if she was questioning what was being said herself. "Come now, dear. Let's get these suitcases packed, okay?"

"No. What…we don't have the best relationship? Well, I'm not a fool, but I can tell we're probably not the greatest communicators. Hell, I'm not even stupid. I know he's probably not the greatest man, either. But, we've been married for eleven years. I get that I spent five of those in a hospital, but that doesn't meant our relationship was shit."

"Delia, that's not at all what I meant. I know you and Happy love each other. You're just twisting my words, okay?" Marina looked at her daughter-in-law, sorry that she had brought up this conversation. "Let's just finish, okay? Happy will be here soon. I'll go find you another bag."

Cordelia followed the elder woman out of the bedroom and down the hall, to the kitchen. "Marina…I didn't mean to make you upset. I'm just so confused! I don't know who I am. Dr. Newman said my memories would be coming back, but I've been out for two weeks and I still don't know anything. It's like, I can't remember who I am, what I like. I don't know why I fell in love with my own husband. I can't remember our relationship. It's so hard to get Happy to talk to me. Sometimes I feel like he didn't even want to be visiting me because we would sit there for hours without talking. I don't even know how I fucking met him, Marina!" Cordelia's eyes teared up. "Oh my…I'm sorry, Marina. I didn't mean to swear...I'm just so frustrated."

Marina came over to hug her surrogate daughter. "I know, dear. It's okay. All of these frustrations, you should share with my son. He'll be here soon and he can clear everything up." Marina explained, pushing some of Cordelia's stray hair behind her ears. "In fact…I think I hear him now." The two women's ears picked up the low rumbling of a motorcycle.

Cordelia wiped her eyes, checking to make sure her mascara wasn't running. Thankful that it wasn't, she followed Marina outside just as Happy pulled up the driveway with another man behind him.

"My son," Marina smiled, hugging Happy, "and you brought Herman!" Marina exclaimed, kissing the blonde haired biker beside Happy on his cheeks. "Come, I'll make you lunch," Marina grabbed his hand and pulled him inside the house before Cordelia could even say 'hello'.

"Hi," Cordelia looked at Happy who was dismounting his bike.

"Hey."

"Today's the day, eh?" Cordelia laughed, trying to make the best of an awkward situation.

"Yeah." Happy nodded at her as he hung his helmet from the handlebars. "Packed?"

"Yes."

"Good."

Cordelia bit her lip. "I…uhm…cut my hair." Cordelia stumbled over her words, nervous in front of her husband.

"I see that." Cordelia waited, expecting him to elaborate more, but he didn't.

"Look, Happy…I have questions-"

"'Bout what?" he interrupted her.

Cordelia, surprised by the sudden outburst, answered, "questions about us. I just…my memory. It's not coming back. I just want to know about us. Where we met, how we got together. Things that every couple knows. I just…I want to know stuff about us."

"Oh. Yeah, sure. I'll tell you later, 'kay? Need to get goin' soon or else we'll be hittin' traffic." Happy stated as her walked by her and into the house. Once again Cordelia found herself following another Lowman around to continue the conversation.

"Hey, Ma," Happy leaned down to kiss his mother's cheek. "You eatin' all their food, Koz?" Happy questioned the blonde biker who was currently stuffing his face at the table.

"She offered!" The blonde man defended. "'Sides, how can I give up a homemade meal?" Kozik smiled at Marina. "You're Ma's one of the best cooks I know!"

"Oh, Kozik! You're such a flatterer," Marina chuckled, "I had no idea you were coming around today, or else I would've made you something special."

"Yeah, well, when Hap said he was comin' to get Del, I offered to come with," Kozik turned in his seat and smiled at the aforementioned Cordelia. "Hey, Del."

"Hello," Cordelia smiled politely, looking between both Marina and Happy. The blonde man did look somewhat familiar, but Cordelia couldn't quite place his face. "I'm sorry, I just don't remember you."

"No problem, dear. We only got to hang out for a little over two years before you went in. Though I'm sad to think I didn't leave an impression," he smiled at her.

"Yeah, well, she ain't rememberin' much, so don't take it personally, Koz," Happy's raspy voice drew Cordelia's attention from the man who was still shoveling food into his mouth.

Cordelia stared at Happy for a while before Marina broke the silence in the kitchen. "Well, if Herman's all fed, we can start loading my car." Marina walked out of the room and Cordelia, Happy, and Kozik all followed her into where Delia had been staying for the past two weeks.

"Jeez, Ma. She's only been here two weeks. How the hell did you and Juanita have time to buy all this stuff?"

"Not to worry, Happy. Just get it to the car, okay?"

* * *

An hour later, all the boxes from Cordelia's room had been placed in Marina's, and now Cordelia's, car. There were clothes laid out all over the back seat and Cordelia was surprised that everything fit into the car. She had for sure thought that she'd need at least two trips to haul the load back to Charming, but she was pleasantly surprised to find that it only looked like it would be the one load.

"Come back soon, all of you. We'll do a nice dinner one night when Juanita's not working," Marina kissed both Happy and Cordelia and hugged Kozik. "Drive safe," she waved as Cordelia got into the car. Happy came up to window and knocked in it so Cordelia would roll it down for him.

"Follow us, 'kay? Case anything happens, it's straight up 99. It'll be fine." Happy stepped away from the window as Cordelia started the car, thankful that Juanita took her to get her license renewed last week. It was a simple test that Cordelia passed quickly to reacquire the small piece of her old life.

"Yeah, sure," she mumbled to herself as she rolled up the window. She watched the two men walk their bikes back towards the street as she turned the car on and put it in gear. "Everything'll be fine." Cordelia watched at Kozik took off first, finding herself wonder why the blonde biker was so familiar. More importantly, Cordelia found herself wondering why, every time she looked at him, she couldn't help but feel dread in the pit of her stomach. She couldn't help but wonder if the feelings she felt around Kozik, another man part of Happy's biker world, were an indication of her recent dreams or if they were an indication of something very real that she simply could not remember.

* * *

_Hello, everyone! Sorry for such a delayed post. I allowed school to overwhelm me, which, unfortunately, prevented me from posting in a timely manner. I know once December comes I will have much more time to write/edit/post, so I am looking forward to that. _

_Have a good rest of your weekend and a happy Sunday! :)  
_


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